nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
