Christians are straight up FREAKS
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
