i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
