when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
