It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I just want nice things and good sex
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
