didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
