Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
