I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
