it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Me too!
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
