You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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