Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Randomize
