By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
