yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Also, beer. Big fan.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
