Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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