i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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