yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
