Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
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