that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
MIDGETS
????
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
