I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize