just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
he had hair everywhere except his balls
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
