just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize