sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
