Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
