She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
