This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
