Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
