Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
