Buhtt sex?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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