I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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