i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
