It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
