See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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