go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
