I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
