Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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