STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
