Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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