I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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