I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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