Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
