Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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