and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
