GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Randomize
