So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
