there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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