Pappa wants mamma naked
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
