just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
