We're facebook friends in real life
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
