My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
