I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
