Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
